Let the Walls Come Down......

God does use the world of blogging for HIS DIVINE APPOINTMENTS!

god has placed me in a season where i must be open and honest. my normal defense mechanisms either won't work or are not allowed. suzanne's way of coping in life was to put walls up and not allow anyone REALLY in, but that isn't the way HE wants me to do things any longer.

it all started about about 2 months ago, when i began corresponding with someone i met through a friend's blog. as it would, for some reason, i felt safe enough to open up to this gal and share with her things i've never shared with anyone. we would chat online for hours. emailing many, many times a day. i believe God hooked the two of us together - He orchestrated the whole thing. He is so good about divine appointments and this was one for the books.

somehow, after only knowing her for a few short weeks, we planned for me to come down to her place for a visit and see what God would do during my time there. i was at a desperate place and needed God to reveal Himself to me in a big way. i could no longer go on 'coping' as i was and i was determined not to do so. i pretty much had thrown all my cards on the table and told God that if He didn't meet me while i was down in south carolina visiting my new friend, then i was done with life!

i am not ready to really blog about my whole trip down to south carolina and i am still really journaling about also. i have already written almost 10 pages and i will share more as the days progress - i promise. let's just say - God showed up in power and i had a face-to-face revelation with Him.

the main thing i was to emphasize is that none of this would have happened if i hadn't let a wall down and allowed God to use this new friend to minister His love to me. i had to open up and be totally honest with Him and with His creature that He placed in my life.

walls may protect us from hurt and harm, but walls can also keep the good stuff out too. in the midst of me protecting myself, i also keep a loving God from revealing Himself to me. i am not saying that i have arrived and that all my walls are down and i am totally open and honest 24/7, but i believe i am on the road to transperancy with Him and those He places in my life.

the first part is being willing and i am sure trying.......

"Search me, O God and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thought.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting."
Psalm 139:23-24